Prior to president Obama’s speech on “jobs” tonight, I thought I’d jot down the most representative cynical statement that pops to mind about each of the candidates for president in 2012.
Compromise means you have to be willing to sacrifice all of your core beliefs.
Social security is a Ponzi scheme. PS: Jobs, jobs, jobs, jobs, jobs, jobs, jobs!
Heroin should be legalized. PS: Gold, gold, gold!
My views may change based on who Iâ€™m speaking to, but my hair is always unchangeably perfect.
Sarah Palin without the charm. Ron Paul without the intellect.
PS: Two dollar gas if Iâ€™m president!
I hold the radical belief that maybe possibly thereâ€™s a chance that science could be right on something.
I have a plan with a catchy name for every problem in America. PS: Muslims, muslims, muslims, muslims!
I agree with everyone here. Now Iâ€™m heading off to the Bahamas. Email me if I win.
I am genuinely surprised to be included in this blog post.
I climbed Mount Everest. I am an actual small-government libertarian governor. But just listen to me talk for a minute. Iâ€™m obviously insane.
Sorry to present the field as a circus, but Iâ€™ve been quite cynical about the theater of it all. Intelligent debate is all but gone from the presidential campaigning process. I would love to see a 2-3 hour debate/conversation between Obama and a reasonable republican like Colin Powell or even Jon Huntsman. But thatâ€™s not happeningâ€¦