it may seem dishonest
but i miss you every day
if the snow melts or if it stays
if the cabs run me over
or if they let me live
i'm sorry i left you
with no reasons to forgive me
for not acting my age
for spilling coffee on a valuable page
of a textbook you hoped you could sell
at the end of the term
i didn't respect you
nor your ambitions for the future of the only sperm you knew
our heads grew like water balloons at a knife fight
it might come as a strange surprise
but i miss you every night
with missed calls on my phone
increasingly content with being alone
and working, working, working
getting bolder, meaner, old