i almost ripped my shower curtains
trying to get out of the tub
so in a way, you could say
i was drowning without you

someone stole all my soap
no suspects, just a cellphone full of leads
based on hair pins and needles mostly
but i'm getting old and cynical
so every face is beginning to resemble a haystack

i fall in love
every time i see your ass in a dress
which reminds me
of the plumbing in the kitchen
since it takes about as much time
for the water to go down
as it did for you to figure out
that this was one sinking ship worth abandoning

i was way ahead of you
roaming the soup sections of grocery stores
in search of a replacement to your cooking
but in the end
all i found there was soup